Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Randomize
