It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Randomize
