Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I didn't notice because vodka
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
