things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
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The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
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Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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