I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize