i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
