dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Houston, we have a squirter
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
