SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
