His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
