Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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