Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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