Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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