I showed him my bush... on skype.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
