My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
