I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
