She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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