Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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