please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
do nipples grow back?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
