you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
