what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
