i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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