Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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