he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
