you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
