you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
