their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
