I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
