Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize