____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
MIDGETS
????
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
