Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
