oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Randomize
