im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
