who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
