make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
