You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize