Hey man sorry I got all grabby
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
