They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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