Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Randomize
