...so i touched it.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
