Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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