i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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