It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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