Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.