Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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