Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
