My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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