How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
