She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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