I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
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