PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
you inspire me to be a worse person
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
