its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
